


Loving Support

by samariumwriting



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst and Fluff, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Blue Lions Route, Minor Spoilers, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-22
Updated: 2019-08-22
Packaged: 2020-09-24 08:30:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20355475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samariumwriting/pseuds/samariumwriting
Summary: Mercedes was soft, and sweet, and wonderful, and if he was anything more than a beast incapable of love he would say he loved her. But she deserved so much more than him, so he didn’t say a word.





	Loving Support

If there was one thing he was terrified of, it was hurting her.

Dimitri had done so many terrible things, he knew that, and he had hurt so many people. So many things scared him. The space between the cobblestones where whispers became shouts. The sputtering of a candle, leaving him in the darkness all alone. The reemerging smile on Felix’s face, his trust waiting to be betrayed once more.

But nothing scared him more than the thought of hurting her.

Mercedes was soft, and sweet, and wonderful, and if he was anything more than a beast incapable of love he would say he loved her. But she deserved so much more than him, so he didn’t say a word.

His mind drifted too often to the prospect of Mercedes impaled on his lance. Her delicate hands shattered in his uncontrolled grip. Losing her in battle when he pushed too far and she broke the line to follow. Being unable to watch her walk away at the end of the war, safe from harm and most importantly safe from him.

But Dimitri was nothing if not cruel to himself and unfair to those who called themselves his friends and allies. So he spent time with her, if only because...she smiled at him like he mattered. She smiled at him like he wasn’t broken, like he hadn’t killed upwards of hundreds in a quest for revenge he could drop like a hat when he decided to let the darkness hide again.

He couldn’t tell anymore which one was real. Perhaps both the monster and the soft-hearted prince were real. Perhaps neither were real. Perhaps everything would fall away, and in reality all of this was a mere hallucination. He had enough of those to go around already.

But with Mercedes...none of it mattered. With Mercedes he could hold someone winter cloak in his hands and attack it with a needle and thread until she took pity. Then, she placed her hands over his own, loosened his grip on the needle, and guided his hands through the motions.

She didn’t need to do it. It didn’t benefit her in the slightest to let him help her. It took just as long, if not far longer, for her to help him complete a task he would likely never be able to complete on his own (no wonder his stepmother had hated him so much in the end, incapable as he was).

She did it anyway. Dimitri didn’t know why. He couldn’t fathom why anyone would dare spend so much time with him. Why anyone would look him in the eye and say they wanted to be with him.

Let alone Mercedes, who was sweetness and light and she could spend her time with anyone in the world if she wanted. But she came to him with that soft smile on her face and the question in her voice. And she poured chamomile tea, always, though he had no idea how she knew it was his favourite.

He didn’t deserve her kindness. He knew that, yet he accepted it every single time regardless. He never stopped to ask her why, for fear she would take the privilege away. Sometimes, caught between thoughts of his own unworthiness, he nearly forgot to thank her for her company and kindness. That made him feel ever more like he was undeserving.

And she was so unfailingly gentle with him. Every word so carefully placed, the tea left to cool before she nudged the cup his way, her baking sweet and packed with flavour he could just barely detect. She put so much time and care into every moment she spent with him. He could do nothing but return the same.

Dimitri was not good at taking care of himself. Everyone knew that. Bar perhaps Felix, everyone encountering him at any time of day would often ask him if he’d eaten much. If they encountered him before or after particular times of day, they’d ask him if he’d slept. He was likely to forget, or have sleep evade him, or feel even Dedue’s cooking turn to dust in his mouth.

But not with Mercedes. She set a date for tea, and at least a snatch of sleep came easier than before when he envisioned her smile on seeing him well-rested. He hated hearing the sadness in her voice, so he would remind himself to eat rather than let her worry over his well being.

He knew it was foolish. He knew he would never be able to love her in the way she deserved or give her the life she deserved. There was also the matter of her adoptive father; he valued her desire to be independent of any nobleman. He would never control her in the way she feared being controlled, but social convention could still take its toll and he could never do that to her.

But she stayed. She stayed by his side far longer than he could ever ask her to. She called herself his loyal friend, at first. She said she wanted not to help him but to support him through all his struggles, all his hardships.

“There’s no point just helping,” she said, “when I could support you instead. I know you could do anything you put your mind to, Dimitri. I just want to make it easier for you.”

He loved her. Every moment he spent with her allowed a little more light to enter his heart. He did not always feel like he deserved that light, that happiness, and he wasn’t sure if he would ever feel as if he truly deserved it.

But when he pressed a kiss to her hand and she laughed, her smile fixed only on him, he didn’t feel like a monster. The feeling in his heart when he was able to make her happy made him feel almost human inside. She drew something tender out of him in a way no one else could, and with every passing day the feeling grew stronger.

The Professor was the one to lead him away from the darkness, to reach out their hand to him and encourage him to live once more. And for that he would always be forever grateful. But the strength to keep on living forever waxed and waned, and words of recovery could not always match his actions.

But Mercedes...no, even with Mercedes, he was never perfect. There were moments where he still felt like everything was crumbling. Instances where the whispers of ghosts shouted louder than the smiles of the living.

With Mercedes by his side, with his love by his side, he felt supported in everything. And her warm hands over his gave him the will to see each ever-brighter dawn.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't usually write things like this but it was fun! If you enjoyed, please leave a comment here or you can say hi on my twitter @samariumwriting.


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